Effort

Several things need doing in my life which require effort. For once, I need to put this effort in. My natural reactions need to be surpressed, limbs need to be loosened, shirts need to be worn, reading needs to be done, money needs to be made and spent, words need to be said and written.

This depresses me.

Although the net result of all of this will hopefully be absoutely fantastic, there is a chance of failure in all of it. If I do it all properly, I shoudn't fail in any of it. But part of it requires me to be me, and I'm not sure that I can do that properly.

As "it" progresses, i'm sure there will be some highly readable mood swings and possibly some vintage mild ranting. I may even be more specific about "it". But for now, contrary to the point of a journal, I'm going to leave you in the dark. On all of it. Because all of it is pretty much pure speculation at this point.

Today I went to a Thorpw park fright night. In 10 hours, I went on 6 rides. Never again will I go during the holidays, pure term-time fun for me. However, detonator is AMAZING, that's the only ride i went on that i hadn't been on before... so much adrenaline, so little time. Apart from the short time i actually spent on rides, the rest of the time spent queing in chav central was confsing, reassuring and slightly akward... all part of a bit of "it" i'm afraid, but the buffet lunch was nice and my feet didn't fall off.

I think a job hunting special might ensue, I'll see how I feel. Right now I feel tired.

Hair update : short again

Childish insult of the decade : your face smells of gay

Shirt update : light bluey grey, diamond dots, ten quid, result!

Best place for openly nosey people : in an open nose of course